It seems like I should write something. I planned to write today, and have this funny heading of “farewell tour.” I was going to say goodbye, or thank you, or something interesting before I go on my trip around the world, but I’ve got nothing…
I’m nervous, but not as nervous as I expected to be. I’m prepared, but don’t have as much money as I had hoped. I have my bags packed and my hair curled, I’m totally ready to sit in an airplane for 12 hours, an airport for 8, and another plane for 8. I’m twiddling my thumbs, I’m anxious, I’m going through all my plans in my head, and I’m watching Say Yes to the Dress!
I have watched three seasons of this show in the past three days. Yup. Watching these women choose a dress for their dream wedding feels about as emotionally charged as the snacks I pick out for the plane ride. I nearly had a meltdown at Fred Meyer trying to decide which travel lotion would be best, and if I had enough space in my bag for two kinds of candy (I do). I gathered up all the courage I had gained from seeing people spend thousands of dollars on a gown and chose M&M’s along with watermelon Sour Patch Kids. It feels like a solid choice.
Ok, I’m ready to say some things… over the past two weeks I have been saying farewell to many of my close friends and family. Literally everyone has helped me in some way, from choosing the clothes in my bag, to washing my car, getting pedicures, driving me around, and making me dinner. I am so grateful to have these humans in my life who have gifted me with their generosity, encouragement, and hugs.
Accepting help isn’t the easiest thing for me to do. I remember a close friend in high school who, out of frustration, would say “let me help you!” But its hard to take up space and its difficult to believe you are worth the effort or inconvenience. The reality is, I have experienced much love and kindness from people in the midst of my need.
So, with that I thank you, and go to sleep in Seattle for last time this year.
P.S. Here are a few pictures with friends from the tour 🙂